Edhird's Blog

Restoring Health: body, mind and spirit


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Archbishop Masimango

We are having a delightful in-person Anglican Mission Clergy Retreat at Richmond Emmanuel Church for the first time since COViD 19. Archbishop Masimango, the Anglican Primate of the Congo who licenses us and is doing ordinations, is here for both the Clergy Retreat and the AMIC Summit.


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Strengthening Marriage: Bridging Emotional Cutoff

For keeners, feel free to read my doctoral thesis on strengthening marriages. Our 45 years of marriage for better for worse has taught us a lot that we love to pass on to others.

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Ed Hird

CAREY THEOLOGICAL COLLEGE

STRENGTHENING MARRIAGE: BRIDGING EMOTIONAL CUTOFF

Doctoral Thesis Project Strengthening Marriages BEC(pdf)

BY

EDWARD ALLEN HIRD

A Doctor of Ministry Project submitted

In partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Ministry

Vancouver, British Columbia

May 2013

CAREY THEOLOGICAL COLLEGE

DOCTOR OF MINISTRY PROGRAM

The undersigned certify that they have read, and recommend for acceptance a

Doctor of Ministry Project entitled

STRENGTHENING MARRIAGE: BRIDGING EMOTIONAL CUTOFF

Submitted by EDWARD ALLEN HIRD

In partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF MINISTRY.

__________________________________

Dr. Patrick J. Ducklow (Supervisor)

__________________________________

Dr. James J. Ponzetti, Jr.

Date: May 26th 2013

CAREY THEOLOGICAL COLLEGE

RELEASE FORM

NAME OF AUTHOR: Edward Allen Hird

TITLE OF PROJECT: Strengthening Marriage: Bridging Emotional Cutoff

DEGREE OF DOCTOR OF MINISTRY

YEAR THIS DEGREE GRANTED: 2013

Permission is hereby granted to the John Allison Library to reproduce copies of this…

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Healing marriages in Rwanda

Our 45th wedding anniversary today (May 21st 2022) reminds me of our passion we have for strengthening marriages throughout the world, including Rwanda.

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After the first marriage seminar in Ruhanga, we went for the next four days with Archbishop Emmanuel #Kolini and Rev Dr Tim Smith to speak on marriage at the Kibungo Diocesan Annual Conference involving 1200 participants. Kibungo, where we were previously in May is in Eastern Rwanda near the Tanzanian border. Click to view some Kibungo Convention photos.

It was a privilege to be teaching along with other great speakers like Archbishop Emmanuel Kolini, Rev Dr Tim Smith of Alabama, Bishop Assiel of Kigeme, Bishop Nathan of Butare, Bishop John Ruchayana, and Rev Dr Antoine, Principal of the Kigali Theological Seminary. Drawing on our new book For Better, For Worse), the Hirds taught on forgiveness and the five languages of apology in one’s marriage , based on Gary Chapman’s amazing book.

Click to see more Kibungo Convention photos,other photos, and yet more photos. The Sunday…

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Final Rwandan Marriage Seminar

Reflecting on our 45th wedding anniversary today (May 21st 2022), it was such a privilege to teach on strengthening marriages in Rwanda, and previously in Uganda.

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My wife Janice and I spoke for the final time in Rwanda at Bugesera , south-east Kigali, near the border of the country of Burundi, just 30 minutes from Kigali. We taught on marriage, based on our new book For Better, For Worse), along with Rev Dr Tim Smith (men’s discipleship) and Archbishop Emmanuel Kolini (restoring the family).

Two archdeaconries came together. We were at the Maranyundo Anglican parish. The first martyrs were thrown in the river there in the 1960s. The Anglican Rector Jonas first prayed for forgiveness before being killed. It was a place of snakes, Tsetse flies and malaria where people were sent in exile . Canon John Paul who is the associate at St. Peter’s with Dr Antoine was our interpreter.

The local Archdeacons Stephen and Jean-Pierre, both genocide survivors, were our hosts.

Click to see photos of the Bugesera marriage seminar.

P. S. Click…

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Strengthening Marriage: Bridging Emotional Cutoff

This summarizes my doctoral thesis on strengthening marriages. On this 45th wedding anniversary, I invite you to consider how emotional cutoff may be affecting your marriage, and how this cutoff can be bridged.

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Edward A. Hird, DMin

In this article, I will discuss emotional cutoff as it relates to marriage through the perspective of Bowen theory, how use of theory can help bridge cutoff and how, in a Judeo-Christian setting, the biblical understanding of covenant can offer a complementary perspective in this task.

At the communion rail with her ex-husband one Sunday, Linda said to the priest, “Someday I would like to marry Lloyd again.” As Linda had said this several times in coaching sessions—and Lloyd had said the same—, the priest asked, “Why not now?” “Sure, why not?” asked Linda. The congregational atmosphere was electric as communion unexpectedly concluded with a marriage service. Linda and Lloyd Lindsay (names changed) had been divorced for six years. The wedding sixteen years ago was followed by pastoral marriage coaching and the church’s Strengthening Marriage Workshop, based on Bowen theory. The couple’s step back into marriage…

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