On May 19th 1987 at 2:15 in the afternoon, I met a dear couple who changed my life. I had no idea that I would spend the next twenty-one years getting to know them better. As long-term Deep Cove residents, the late Mr and Mrs Ashley and Rita Carr helped a rather naïve, well-meaning 32-year-old Anglican clergyman learn more about the meaning of life.
As some of the longest members of our Deep Cove congregation, Rita and Ashley taught me much about the people and life of our congregation back in the early pioneering 1950s. Some of their stories, especially about going fishing with Bud the local Anglican priest, were hilarious and full of fun. Rita and Ashley had a way of making a person feel deeply loved and welcomed. They truly lived out the Golden Rule and the Good Book’s call to love one’s neighbour as themselves.
I will always remember that first home visit with Rita and Ashley on Dollarton Highway. As she always did in each succeeding visit, Rita fed me with juice and cookies, and then asked about my family and the congregation. She said to me “It’s about time to get back into the fold”, commenting that when children get older, it’s easy to become inactive.
Some people say nice things to clergy to make them feel better, hoping that they will go away. Rita and Ashley were people of their word. First Rita came back to church, dropped off by Ashley. But gradually Ashley returned as well. They had their favorite seat in the congregation. Even though the Carrs were older, they loved the liveliness of the younger people in our contemporary 10:30am service.
Rita and Ashley aged well. They were one of the most loving and good-natured older couples that I have known. Their deep love for each other ‘for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part’ was an inspiration to many younger couples. Rita was part of the Sweet Adelines singers for many years. She really was one of the sweetest Deep Cove residents that I have had the privilege of meeting. Rita and Ashley were always so good-tempered and kind to others. Even in the worst of times, they always left me feeling better after visiting them.
At the end of every home visit, I would offer to read the bible and pray with them. Rita was a deep woman of prayer. She always prayed with me for each member of her family that they would know Jesus’ love for them. Even after her health made her a shut-in, Rita kept in touch with her church family and friends. It was hard for her to not be able to attend her regular Thursday morning St. Simon’s NV home group. But she was always there in spirit.
On July 4th 2008, Rita went home to be with the Lord. Her husband Ashley deeply missed her. As a World War II ‘war bride’, Rita had three homes: England, Deep Cove and Heaven. Rita was ready to go Home. She had a deep confidence in what Jesus had accomplished for her on the cross, and a quiet assurance of the reality of life after death. Like many in the Deep Cove/Seymour community, I deeply miss Rita, and look forward to having ‘English tea’ with her some day in heaven.
One summer I was privileged to take the wedding of Ashley and Rita Carr’s granddaughter right in the Carr condominion. During the marriage service, I reminded their granddaughter of the great example that Rita had set, of Rita’s love and faithfulness: “Be like Rita. The love of Jesus shone through her.”
The Rev. Dr. Ed Hird, BSW, MDiv, DMin
– previously published in the North Shore News/Deep Cove Crier
P. S. Click this Amazon link to view for free the first two chapters of our new novel Blue Sky.
“I’m afraid there’s been an accident…”
Sandy Brown and her family have just moved to Spokane, Washington where her husband, Scott, is pastoring a new church. With a fresh start, Sandy is determined to devote more time to her four children. But, within weeks of settling in their new life, the Brown family is plunged into turmoil.
Sandy receives shocking news that her children aren’t safe, which brings back haunting memories of the trauma she experienced as a girl. Then, the unthinkable happens…
A brutal attack puts Sandy on the brink of losing everything she’s loved. Her faith in God and the family she cherishes are pushed to the ultimate limit.
Is healing possible when so many loved ones are hurt? Are miracles really possible through the power of prayer? Can life return to the way it was before?
Blue Sky reveals how a mother’s most basic instinct isn’t for survival… but for family.
If you’re a fan of Karen Kingsbury, then you’ll love Blue Sky. Get your copy today on paperback or kindle.
-The sequel book Restoring Health: body, mind and spirit is available online with Amazon.com in both paperback and ebook form. Dr. JI Packer wrote the foreword, saying “I heartily commend what he has written.” The book focuses on strengthening a new generation of healthy leaders. Drawing on examples from Titus’ healthy leadership in the pirate island of Crete, it shows how we can embrace a holistically healthy life.
To receive a signed copy within North America, just etransfer at ed_hird@telus.net, giving your address. Cheques are also acceptable.
-Click to purchase the Companion Bible Study by Jan Cox (for the Battle of the Soul of Canada) in both paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com and Amazon.ca
-Click to purchase the Companion Bible Study by Jan Cox (for the Battle of the Soul of Canada) in both paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com and Amazon.ca
To purchase any of our six books in paperback or ebook on Amazon, just click on this link.
Fighting makes us feel strong. Prayer reminds us that we are vulnerable. Fighting makes us feel in control. Prayer reminds us to let go and let God. Fighting feeds on anger and bitterness. Prayer feeds on forgiveness and peace.
I became a Christian 46 years ago, after 17 years of spiritual hide-and-seek. Being raised in church, I was taught to pray as a child but never really understood the intimacy of a real relationship. As a teenager, my prayer life gradually faded into non-existence. I never rejected God. I just kept God at a convenient distance without even realizing it.
God to me was not untrue, but rather irrelevant. I never rejected prayer. It just slipped off my radar screen into oblivion. I never rejected the Church. I just found it painfully boring and obscure. Though I was desperately seeking for the meaning of life, I had no idea that the Church would have anything to offer in that area.
When I was brutally attacked as a teenager by a gang member, I turned to martial arts in a secret desire for both self-defense and revenge. Fighting made me feel strong. I had no idea that prayer might turn out to be a more powerful weapon. Within a year, I came to know Jesus Christ on a personal basis, and lost the desire to get even. A few years later, I discovered that this bully had gone after someone larger than him who had kicked this bully’s teeth in and twisted a broken beer bottle in his face. Hearing that story taught me that violence always breeds violence. It was better to forgive because there is always ‘a faster gunfighter just waiting around the corner.’ Even with that realization, it still took me twenty years before I finally parted company with martial arts.
When I met Jesus Christ 46 years ago, I was flabbergasted that someone was actually listening. Prayer no longer felt like talking to the ceiling plaster. It felt personal, real, and infectious. I couldn’t get enough of connecting to this new best-friend. There had been an emptiness inside me that skiing, golfing, and parties couldn’t fill. Through prayer, I felt a new inner peace and warmth that even my former drinking buddies noticed.
Going back to church, I noticed that church wasn’t as boring as it used to be. While it may have changed, the big thing was that I had changed from the inside out. I developed a new love and concern for people that I used to avoid and even look down on. Instead of resenting life, I began to wake up looking forward to the next adventure that was ahead of me.
One of the things that troubled me though, as a new Christian, was the infighting between all the different denominations. Why couldn’t the Anglicans, Baptists, Pentecostals, Mennonites, Presbyterians, etc learn to get along and stop competing? Sometimes Christians reminded me of my old life as a non-Christian when I would rather fight than pray.
One of the wonderful gifts of serving on the North Shore from 1987 to 2018 is that denominational bickering is at an all-time low. Clergy and pastors speak well of each other’s congregations and even freely send parishioners to attend other churches. There is a generosity among North Shore pastors that allows them to bless each other instead of cursing each other.
This hasn’t happened by accident. It is the fruit of forty years of weekly prayer by the North Shore clergy, first at Hillside Baptist, then at Valley Church, and now at Sutherland Church. By praying together on the second Wednesday of each month, God has been teaching the North Shore pastors how much we need each other. North Shore Clergy have been learning that they are too busy not to pray. By focusing on Jesus Christ, they have been rediscovering that we are on the same team. Denominations are second. Jesus is first.
Every denomination has its own strengths and weaknesses. Instead of putting down another group for their flaws, we are learning to hold them up in prayer that they may become all that they are meant to be. Presbyterians don’t need to become Anglicans, and Anglicans don’t need to become Baptists. Our real calling is to love each other with the life-changing love of Jesus Christ. Many churches have formed because someone was hurt. We have been learning that it is time to forgive, time to heal, time to pray. Why fight when we can pray? My prayer for those reading this article is that we may rediscover the deep truth that the family that prays together stays together.
The Rev. Dr. Ed Hird, BSW, MDiv, DMin
-previously published in the North Shore News/Deep Cove Crier
P. S. Click this Amazon link to view for free the first two chapters of our new novel Blue Sky.
“I’m afraid there’s been an accident…”
Sandy Brown and her family have just moved to Spokane, Washington where her husband, Scott, is pastoring a new church. With a fresh start, Sandy is determined to devote more time to her four children. But, within weeks of settling in their new life, the Brown family is plunged into turmoil.
Sandy receives shocking news that her children aren’t safe, which brings back haunting memories of the trauma she experienced as a girl. Then, the unthinkable happens…
A brutal attack puts Sandy on the brink of losing everything she’s loved. Her faith in God and the family she cherishes are pushed to the ultimate limit.
Is healing possible when so many loved ones are hurt? Are miracles really possible through the power of prayer? Can life return to the way it was before?
Blue Sky reveals how a mother’s most basic instinct isn’t for survival… but for family.
If you’re a fan of Karen Kingsbury, then you’ll love Blue Sky. Get your copy today on paperback or kindle.
-The sequel book Restoring Health: body, mind and spirit is available online with Amazon.com in both paperback and ebook form. Dr. JI Packer wrote the foreword, saying “I heartily commend what he has written.” The book focuses on strengthening a new generation of healthy leaders. Drawing on examples from Titus’ healthy leadership in the pirate island of Crete, it shows how we can embrace a holistically healthy life.
To receive a signed copy within North America, just etransfer at ed_hird@telus.net, giving your address. Cheques are also acceptable.
-Click to purchase the Companion Bible Study by Jan Cox (for the Battle of the Soul of Canada) in both paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com and Amazon.ca
-Click to purchase the Companion Bible Study by Jan Cox (for the Battle of the Soul of Canada) in both paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com and Amazon.ca
To purchase any of our six books in paperback or ebook on Amazon, just click on this link.
The story is told of two men, Harry and Stan, who have known each other for some time. Harry has fallen upon hard times and has come to his old friend asking for some help.
“Why come to me?”, Stan asks. “Why should I help you out? What have you ever done for me?”
“What have I ever done for you?”, Harry gasps. “Why, don’t you remember when your house burned down several years ago, and you and your family moved in with me?”
“Yes, I remember. But…”
“And what about the time your child was in danger of drowning and I jumped into the lake to rescue him?”
“Yes, but…”
“And how about the time that you lost your job and I gave you all that money? Don’t you remember? I’ve done lots for you through the years!”
“Everything you say is true enough”, Stan says. “But what have you done for me lately?”
Most of us on the North Shore have many things to be grateful for: employment, children, family, food on the table, a roof over our head, the forest, the mountains, the beaches, the sunshine. All these things are wonderful gifts from God. Prayer is simply a way of saying “Thank you” for all these wonderful gifts. It is so easy to grumble and complain. It takes work to be grateful and thankful for what we have. When we make the decision to say “thank you”, things begin to change in our lives. When we make the decision to acknowledge our “Higher Power”, more peace and contentment can enter our personal lives. Prayer really changes things, but first it changes us!
Dr. Reginald Bibby, the famous Canadian sociologist, has done some very interesting statistical research on the prayer habits and beliefs of Canadians. He found that 75% of Canadians pray privately at least once in a while, 30% pray daily, and 28% say grace before meals at least once a week. Close to 50% of Canadians acknowledge the possibility of having experienced God’s presence in their daily lives. Bibby also notes that more than 40% of the nation’s 15 to 19 year olds believe that they have experienced God. Clearly prayer is still a meaningful activity for the vast majority of Canadians. But Canadians, especially the Baby-boomers, are wanting prayer to be much more experiential and informal than in the past.
Even though Canadians are people of prayer, they are also very private about their prayer lives. Often even their spouses, or their closest friends don’t know about the extent of their prayer lives. In previous decades, the taboo subjects were sex, death, and politics. In our “liberated” age, the one topic that people still feel embarrassed to mention in polite conversation is their prayer lives. Yet studies, referred to in Newsweek, show that spouses who can pray together report greater degrees of marital satisfaction and greater sexual intimacy. One study showed that while up to 1 in 2 marriages break up, only 1 in 20 marriages break up where both of the couple regularly attend church. More significantly, the study showed that only 1 in 200 couples break up where both couples go to church regularly and pray together on a regular basis. It is encouraging to see research confirm the historic belief that “the family that prays together stays together.” Prayer, it seems, really changes things.
Even medical science is beginning to confirm that prayer really makes a difference in the health and recovery of individuals. In an experiment at San Francisco General Hospital, reported in the Southern Medical Journal, a researcher asked outsiders to pray for a group of cardiac patients. Even though the patients weren’t told that prayers were being said for them, the study found that they recovered faster than those in an otherwise identical control group. Studies by Harvard Cardiologist Dr. Herbert Benson showed that patients that prayed were more successful at lowering metabolic rates, slowing the heart rate and reducing other symptoms of stress. Even science is showing that prayer really changes things.
My prayer is that more and more of us will be able to break the taboos around prayer, and begin to discover for ourselves that prayer really changes things.
-previously published in the Deep Cove Crier/North Shore News
P. S. Click this Amazon link to view for free the first two chapters of our new novel Blue Sky.
“I’m afraid there’s been an accident…”
Sandy Brown and her family have just moved to Spokane, Washington where her husband, Scott, is pastoring a new church. With a fresh start, Sandy is determined to devote more time to her four children. But, within weeks of settling in their new life, the Brown family is plunged into turmoil.
Sandy receives shocking news that her children aren’t safe, which brings back haunting memories of the trauma she experienced as a girl. Then, the unthinkable happens…
A brutal attack puts Sandy on the brink of losing everything she’s loved. Her faith in God and the family she cherishes are pushed to the ultimate limit.
Is healing possible when so many loved ones are hurt? Are miracles really possible through the power of prayer? Can life return to the way it was before?
Blue Sky reveals how a mother’s most basic instinct isn’t for survival… but for family.
If you’re a fan of Karen Kingsbury, then you’ll love Blue Sky. Get your copy today on paperback or kindle.
-The sequel book Restoring Health: body, mind and spirit is available online with Amazon.com in both paperback and ebook form. Dr. JI Packer wrote the foreword, saying “I heartily commend what he has written.” The book focuses on strengthening a new generation of healthy leaders. Drawing on examples from Titus’ healthy leadership in the pirate island of Crete, it shows how we can embrace a holistically healthy life.
To receive a signed copy within North America, just etransfer at ed_hird@telus.net, giving your address. Cheques are also acceptable.
-Click to purchase the Companion Bible Study by Jan Cox (for the Battle of the Soul of Canada) in both paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com and Amazon.ca
-Click to purchase the Companion Bible Study by Jan Cox (for the Battle of the Soul of Canada) in both paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com and Amazon.ca
To purchase any of our six books in paperback or ebook on Amazon, just click on this link.
I will always remember that first home visit with Rita and Ashley on Dollarton Highway. As she always did in each succeeding visit, Rita fed me with juice and cookies, and then asked about my family and the congregation. She said to me “It’s about time to get back into the fold”, commenting that when children get older, it’s easy to become inactive.
Rita and Ashley aged well. They were one of the most loving and good-natured older couples that I have known. Their deep love for each other ‘for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part’ was an inspiration to many younger couples. Rita was part of the Sweet Adelines singers for many years. She really was one of the sweetest Deep Cove residents that I have had the privilege of meeting. Rita and Ashley were always so good-tempered and kind to others. Even in the worst of times, they always left me feeling better after visiting them.
On July 4th 2008, Rita went home to be with the Lord. Her husband Ashley deeply missed her. As a World War II ‘war bride’, Rita had three homes: England, Deep Cove and Heaven. Rita was ready to go Home. She had a deep confidence in what Jesus had accomplished for her on the cross, and a quiet assurance of the reality of life after death. Like many in the Deep Cove/Seymour community, I deeply miss Rita, and look forward to having ‘English tea’ with her some day in heaven.
Sandy Brown and her family have just moved to Spokane, Washington where her husband, Scott, is pastoring a new church. With a fresh start, Sandy is determined to devote more time to her four children. But, within weeks of settling in their new life, the Brown family is plunged into turmoil.
Newsweek, show that spouses who can pray together report greater degrees of marital satisfaction and greater sexual intimacy. One study showed that while up to 1 in 2 marriages break up, only 1 in 20 marriages break up where both of the couple regularly attend church. More significantly, the study showed that only 1 in 200 couples break up where both couples go to church regularly and pray together on a regular basis. It is encouraging to see research confirm the historic belief that “the family that prays together stays together.” Prayer, it seems, really changes things.
Sandy Brown and her family have just moved to Spokane, Washington where her husband, Scott, is pastoring a new church. With a fresh start, Sandy is determined to devote more time to her four children. But, within weeks of settling in their new life, the Brown family is plunged into turmoil.
Edhird's Blog 